House Republicans hate America, and other stories

It’s a busy time at work, my thoughts are scattered, and I’ve partially shut down my cranium, furloughing all non-essential brain activity until John Boehner agrees to eat a bug.

So because Republicans don’t need to have a coherent strategy or argument, I don’t need to have a coherent column. Here, then, are some brief, topical observations, starting with the ongoing government shutdown (aka House Republicans’ dogged determination to crater the world economy unless people with suspicious-looking moles stop hating our country).

And a little child shall lead them

You could say that House Republicans are acting like children, but children only threaten to hold their breath until they turn blue, whereas Republicans are threatening to smother us with ether-soaked pillows until we all turn purple and die.

Children sit behind you on airplanes and kick your seat all the way from Chicago to Hawaii. House Republicans highjack the plane because they want the in-flight movie to be VeggieTales instead of Brokeback Mountain.

Democrats should already be preparing their list of demands for the next time we have a Republican president and a Democratic House majority. And at least one of those simply must involve Ted Cruz in a garter and rhinestone-encrusted g-string riding Michele Bachmann around Brainerd like a tauntaun.

Feeling hoarse

Frankly, I’ve become a bit bored with the whole Solidarity Singalong controversy, though it was fun while it lasted. Sing. Don’t sing. Get a permit. Don’t get a permit. The answer is blowing in the Zzzzzzzzz.

All along, I’ve thought the real story in all this was Scott Walker’s myopia, his thin skin, and his willingness — even eagerness — to go with the nuclear option even though diplomacy was working just fine. If nothing else, the singers proved — to Wisconsin and the rest of the nation — that Scott Walker is not presidential material.

Recently, this roiling controversy has quieted down, with Capitol police abruptly halting their daily arrests. Now comes news that the Walker administration has settled a free speech lawsuit with the ACLU that was filed in relation to the controversy.

According to The Progressive, “as part of the agreement, protesters no longer need to have a permit to protest in the state capitol. All they have [to do] is notify the administration. Nor do they have to assume any liability, as they were required to do before.”

Seems to me like the whole brouhaha is fizzling, but at its height, it allowed more and more people to see Scott Walker’s true nature — and it was pretty ugly. Let’s call it a victory and move on.



Real business experience

I feel obliged to share my initial thoughts on former Trek Bicycle executive and state Commerce Secretary Mary Burke’s announcement that she’s running for governor, and upon sincere and solemn reflection, I have concluded that she is not Scott Walker. That’s reason enough to at least tentatively back her.

She has some real business bona fides — which means something, but not as much as many people would like to think. As I’ve argued before, running a business doesn’t necessarily prepare you for running a government. (See Hoover, Herbert and Bush, George W.) But she does have more business experience than Scott Walker. So will all those Republicans who insisted that Mitt Romney’s business success made him the clear choice over Barack Obama now back Burke?

Don’t hold your breath.

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