Grand old lunacy: Republicans need to get past their infatuation with Trump

Okay, Republicans. Let’s get serious. Honestly, this isn’t funny anymore. I have to admit, we left-of-center types got kind of a kick out of the Sarah Palin thing, and Dan Quayle … well, that was a good one. You really had us going there for a while. But Trump? Please, just stop. I know you’re having a good time with this, but someone could get hurt.

Of course, to many a forlorn soul, Donald Trump holds appeal as a presidential candidate because he speaks bluntly and has run a successful business. Indeed, it’s his reputation as a hard-nosed real estate mogul that leads many to believe he’s an effective decision-maker.

Um, sorry. I respectfully disagree. First of all, every day he’s forced to decide what color his face will be when he leaves the house, and every day he picks burnt orange. I mean, the guy looks like a drunk tribble trying to swallow a giant circus peanut. Strike one, and that doesn’t even include the hair.

Secondly, he brought up the birther thing. As a result, his sole accomplishment in the political arena thus far is making himself look dumber than he looked the day before.

Third – and this is important – being spectacularly wealthy is neither a necessary nor sufficient condition for effective leadership. Business acumen should certainly be part of the conversation when it comes to casting your vote, but it can’t be the end all, be all. The federal government isn’t Celebrity Apprentice. You have the option of firing Gary Busey when he gets that look on his face that tells you he’s about to devour a live sea otter. Unfortunately, the same can’t be said of Michele Bachmann. If Donald Trump gets to be president just because he makes a lot of money, we might as well make the ShamWow guy chair of the Federal Reserve.

Finally, he’s the loosest of loose cannons. When he’s not showing his presidential timber by picking fights with inconsequential celebrities and workaday journalists, he’s saying some truly scary things.

Lately, he’s started to talk tough with China, remarking, “China is raping this country” – even though (ahem), he personally profits off stuff that’s made in China.

Here he was last November, in an interview with Fox News: “Well, I would love to have a trade war with China.”

Really, Don? China holds nearly $1 trillion of our debt. It’s impossible to say what would happen if we angered the Chinese to the point that they started dumping their holdings in U.S. treasuries, but suffice to say it would be worse than Rosie O’Donnell calling you names on The View.

Certainly, we could stand to have an honest discussion about our economic relationship with China, but it would be nice if the guy starting it didn’t have the diplomatic skills of Mel Gibson at an open-bar bat mitzvah.

Right now, the economy is like a little newborn fawn struggling to stand on its own – there’s plenty of hope there, but its legs are still wobbly. Let’s not send Paulie Walnuts out to the woods to shoot it in the face with rock salt.

There’s little doubt that our decades-long Keynesian bender can’t be sustained indefinitely – even the most profligate government spenders will have to come to that realization eventually. We need to have that discussion. But good God, Trump? Seriously, if you feel blindsided by Scott Walker, just wait until this professional buffoon gets his hands on the levers of government.

Color me unimpressed.

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