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Dec 17, 201210:47 AMFinancial Perspectives

with Michael Dubis, CFP

No perspectives, just a father’s reaction to tragedy and healing

No perspectives, just a father’s reaction to tragedy and healing

(page 1 of 2)

I was trying to meet my monthly commitment to IBMadison.com, but what I was writing was just so relatively unimportant right now that I couldn’t focus on it.

This national tragedy in Connecticut is shocking and awful. This is one of the worst things I’ve witnessed or could ever imagine. So I write to hopefully share in the healing with you. This is admittedly pretty raw, but I believe it’s healthy to just react as normal people would rather than let the media and politicians contrive emotions for us. Please feel free to share as well.

I’m reeling. As a father, I can’t help but feel sad, nauseated, angry, and devastated. I can’t look at my kids, think about this tragedy, and not cry. So I don’t. I save those tears for the children and parents in Connecticut. I look at my kids and am even more grateful for their health and life. I’m also grateful for my life and my wife’s life – that we can be here to be with our children, to raise them and to love them. I’m going to try to use this pain in a way to make things better for my family and community. It will take time, but I hope it starts here.

I’m also very angry, not just at the situation, but at God. “God Is.” That Truth is at the center of my life and is what has Saved me. Without it, I would be nothing but ashes and dust. But today, I can’t find reason in my mind why God would allow this to happen. God is way beyond my understanding, and so is this tragedy. Christmas will renew my Spirit; it must, but for now, I’m Spiritually depleted.

How will these families recover? Will they? I’m praying for those families every day with the greatest sincerity of heart. I’m praying for ALL families who have lost a child or loved one, including those that do not make the headlines. This tragedy is horrific, but experiencing the loss of a child at any time or any age under any circumstance is equally visceral and tragic.

I’m praying for wisdom as we as a nation of real people reflect on this. We have unity around this, which is rare today. We now need honest leaders to heal with us, not the insulting rhetoric or the current politicizing of this event by the few in the government who have already started to do this – who are quickly dividing us once again. It’s so disgusting that I’ve turned the TV off. There will be a time for politics and there will be time to address the big issues, but it’s not now – at least not for me. Let’s instead lead by our own example rather than letting the TV speak for us before we’re ready to speak.

Dec 19, 2012 09:07 am
 Posted by  Torrey

As a spiritual person, I too find this terribly difficult to make sense of. It seems to me these types of tragedies happen due to the free will God has given us. I don't believe God does a lot of direct intervening in the world. He has given us free will, and in truth life is meaningless without it, but tragic because of it. The same thing which gives life its specialness also enables the evil we see in the world. As I said, I don't believe God does a lot of direct intervening in the world, choosing instead to work through people. And although we can never perfectly ensure a tragedy like this will never happen again, there are steps we can take as a society to greatly reduce the chances. In time those difficult conversations will happen and action will be taken. Most people will not see God's fingerprint on those plans - but as they are implemented by His people, they will be there nonetheless. Above all, it is important to keep this in mind: "Christianity doesn't deny the reality of suffering and evil... Our hope... is not based on the idea that we are going to be free of pain and suffering. Rather, it is based on the conviction that we will triumph over suffering." -- Brennan Manning. And that is the true place where you can see God working through people, as we all work to help those affected eventually, in time, triumph over this horrific tragedy.

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About This Blog

It is an understatement to say the world has experienced a radical shift in capital markets. There are more layers of information and opinions on the direction of the world than we've seen in decades. The internet and the media do not always make it easier, but Michael Dubis' contribution through IB blogs will help you sift through the noise and give you some perspective. You can find his company online.

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